Monday, August 29, 2005
Lifelong Learning
I went to school this morning and I learned more in 5 hours than I've learned all summer long. It was a day of transformation for me. I've realized that the ways I have been dealing with conflicts with my parents and my siblings is nowhere near constructive. This class has changed my whole thinking pattern and it was such a rapid change too. It was wierd. Definetly needed, but wierd. It was so useful too, I was able to help out so much just in one day. I think its crazy... 5 hours and my life is changed. I think truthfully it took like half an hour for me to realize that I'm not anywhere close to where I want to be in anything really. But then I thought, who is? Everyday we're learning and everyday we're going to learn. Its lifelong and its never going to end.
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Slacking
I was thinking about slacking today. Not only because I've being a slacker when it comes to writing in my blog but also because I choose to not do enough in many parts of my life.
For the last two days I've been saying to myself that I would email Karyn and that I would read John. Have I done any of those things? no.... I've done other productive things but the things that I've deliberately set out to do I haven't gotten around to. I'm thinking of starting a list and locking myself in my room until everything is done. That would get things done.. I'd go crazy but everything that I needed to be done would be finished.
I've been slacking in my prayer life as well. I'll be praying and then my mind will wander and I'll end up having a conversation with myself instead of with God. I find that I barely ever even finish my prayers because I'll get sidetracked. It happens so often. I try so hard not to but it still happens. I'm going to pray for God's help in this situation because I can't do it on my own. I was praying the bible the other day and I didn't get sidetracked then so I think I'm going to do that more often and stand up and walk around while I'm praying. Those things will most likely help.
I was reading something in Proverbs yesterday... or maybe it was the day before... I don't remember but it talked about laziness and I was going to write it down and give it to Andrew but it seems that right now I'm in need of it as well. I'm being extremely lazy and that's not what I was made to do. I have lots of energy, I have nothing wrong with my legs or my arms or anything so that brings me to thinking that I wasn't meant for sitting around on my butt all day doing nothing. I'm supposed to be out doing things.
I was talking to my little brother about Jesus today. He's so adorable and he loves sitting and talking with me. He would much rather talk about lamps though... I tried talking about heaven and stuff with him . He was really cute , I told him God lived in heaven and he said he wanted to fly up to see him. I told him that God made the trees and stuff and he thought that that was cool. My baby is the greatest kid in the world. I spent the whole morning with him. We listened to Jesus music while I gave him a massage and put lotion on to his arms and legs and hands and feet. We made a bracelet and a necklace too and he's been wearing them all day which is surprising because normally they would've been given back to me after a half an hour of him wearing them.
I've had a good day, My moms going to take me shopping for swimming shorts soon and tonight I'm going to spend some time with God and I'm going to read John. I really like that book, It's all Jesus-y:).
For the last two days I've been saying to myself that I would email Karyn and that I would read John. Have I done any of those things? no.... I've done other productive things but the things that I've deliberately set out to do I haven't gotten around to. I'm thinking of starting a list and locking myself in my room until everything is done. That would get things done.. I'd go crazy but everything that I needed to be done would be finished.
I've been slacking in my prayer life as well. I'll be praying and then my mind will wander and I'll end up having a conversation with myself instead of with God. I find that I barely ever even finish my prayers because I'll get sidetracked. It happens so often. I try so hard not to but it still happens. I'm going to pray for God's help in this situation because I can't do it on my own. I was praying the bible the other day and I didn't get sidetracked then so I think I'm going to do that more often and stand up and walk around while I'm praying. Those things will most likely help.
I was reading something in Proverbs yesterday... or maybe it was the day before... I don't remember but it talked about laziness and I was going to write it down and give it to Andrew but it seems that right now I'm in need of it as well. I'm being extremely lazy and that's not what I was made to do. I have lots of energy, I have nothing wrong with my legs or my arms or anything so that brings me to thinking that I wasn't meant for sitting around on my butt all day doing nothing. I'm supposed to be out doing things.
I was talking to my little brother about Jesus today. He's so adorable and he loves sitting and talking with me. He would much rather talk about lamps though... I tried talking about heaven and stuff with him . He was really cute , I told him God lived in heaven and he said he wanted to fly up to see him. I told him that God made the trees and stuff and he thought that that was cool. My baby is the greatest kid in the world. I spent the whole morning with him. We listened to Jesus music while I gave him a massage and put lotion on to his arms and legs and hands and feet. We made a bracelet and a necklace too and he's been wearing them all day which is surprising because normally they would've been given back to me after a half an hour of him wearing them.
I've had a good day, My moms going to take me shopping for swimming shorts soon and tonight I'm going to spend some time with God and I'm going to read John. I really like that book, It's all Jesus-y:).
Saturday, August 06, 2005
God is love
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8Love never fails.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I was reading this scripture because I've always liked it. It fills me with happiness whenever I come across it. I was reading it yesterday and I decided to insert God wherever it said love because God is love.
God is patient, God is kind. God does not envy, God does not boast, God is not proud. God is not rude, God is not self seeking, God is not easily angered, God keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. God always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. God never fails.
Wow, that definetly made my day yesterday. I was ecstatic. It made me so happy.
Friday, August 05, 2005
In the beginning...
I was reading the blogs of some friends and then got all of these thoughts so I had to make my own... I know, I'm such a copycat, but I couldn't help my self. My mind was racing and all of my thoughts had to go somewhere so why not right here.
I had this dream last night. These two guys came up through my gate and went straight for Tim and started choking him. My Mom, Dad, and I all ran outside. My mom saved Tim and then they started choking her. My Dad helped her out and there I was running around like a maniac "Jesus is Lord!" "Jesus is Lord!". My Dad got one of the guys and then tied him up in the backyard. Everyone went back to normal. My Dad was watering the grass, My mom went to the kitchen, Tim sat at the picnic table, and I stood on the porch thinking about how crazy it was that there was a murderer tied up in my backyard like a dog. The other guy came back and went after me. The guy who was tied up in the backyard got free and came after me also. They're both coming after me and one has the chance to kill me and he didn't take it. He came and put his arm around my neck and I couldn't get "Jesus is Lord" out of my mouth anymore. He pinched this one part in my neck so that I couldn't be heard anymore.
Well I didn't really think much about my dream until I started writing this but I believe I've gotten it pretty much all figured out. In it I think that the two guys were the devil and it shows how the devil will go after everyone, it doesn't matter if they're disabled, elderly, anything. I think it also shows how we can tame the devil and keep him away by having the Lord number one on our list and using his strength to keep the devil away but if you forget about the Lord and he loses the number one spot then the devils going to take that advantage and run with it. The devils silenced me at the end. I was no longer able to proclaim the truth and I think that that can happen. You start thinking about other things and when theres someone who needs prayer instead of praying for them you blow them off thinking that someone else will do it for you. But I think that if you have the opportunity to witness to someone or help someone in need then you should take it. I know I probably sound like a hypocrite because I often keep my mouth shut when I know that I'm supposed to be witnessing. That happened when I was on Gabriola Island. This man needed Jesus and I know Jesus and I could have introduced them, I believe this man was sent to me to find Jesus but I didn't say a word. Not a word. That bothered me a lot afterwords. I could have brought Jesus to someone in need and I didn't. Fear took a hold of me and I froze. I still can't believe I did that. It's something that I don't ever want to do again.
I had this dream last night. These two guys came up through my gate and went straight for Tim and started choking him. My Mom, Dad, and I all ran outside. My mom saved Tim and then they started choking her. My Dad helped her out and there I was running around like a maniac "Jesus is Lord!" "Jesus is Lord!". My Dad got one of the guys and then tied him up in the backyard. Everyone went back to normal. My Dad was watering the grass, My mom went to the kitchen, Tim sat at the picnic table, and I stood on the porch thinking about how crazy it was that there was a murderer tied up in my backyard like a dog. The other guy came back and went after me. The guy who was tied up in the backyard got free and came after me also. They're both coming after me and one has the chance to kill me and he didn't take it. He came and put his arm around my neck and I couldn't get "Jesus is Lord" out of my mouth anymore. He pinched this one part in my neck so that I couldn't be heard anymore.
Well I didn't really think much about my dream until I started writing this but I believe I've gotten it pretty much all figured out. In it I think that the two guys were the devil and it shows how the devil will go after everyone, it doesn't matter if they're disabled, elderly, anything. I think it also shows how we can tame the devil and keep him away by having the Lord number one on our list and using his strength to keep the devil away but if you forget about the Lord and he loses the number one spot then the devils going to take that advantage and run with it. The devils silenced me at the end. I was no longer able to proclaim the truth and I think that that can happen. You start thinking about other things and when theres someone who needs prayer instead of praying for them you blow them off thinking that someone else will do it for you. But I think that if you have the opportunity to witness to someone or help someone in need then you should take it. I know I probably sound like a hypocrite because I often keep my mouth shut when I know that I'm supposed to be witnessing. That happened when I was on Gabriola Island. This man needed Jesus and I know Jesus and I could have introduced them, I believe this man was sent to me to find Jesus but I didn't say a word. Not a word. That bothered me a lot afterwords. I could have brought Jesus to someone in need and I didn't. Fear took a hold of me and I froze. I still can't believe I did that. It's something that I don't ever want to do again.
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